Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Expectations

According to Merriam-Webster,



"expectation" is defined as
"the act or state of expecting: anticipating"

"to expect" is
"to wait, stay, to look forward"

"to anticipate" means
"to look forward to as certain"


As certain. I've been thinking lately about expectations. Having expectations seems to imply something significant for me. It is a sense of entitlement. I believe that I have the right, and therefore establish expectations based on those rights.




Think on this. I believe that I'm entitled to a day of peace after a long week. I expect the day to be without conflict and difficulty. When life interferes with my plans, my expectations are dashed, and peace whisks away in the combustion of the moment. But I'm entitled, right? I work hard for everyone in my life everyday. This is MY day. A down day. A peaceful rest. Or maybe it isn't a day, but an hour. Or a few moments. I deserve at least that, don't I? One twist, one moment of failed expectation, and I'm robbed. Robbed of all I anticipated. Robbed of my peace. Robbed.



Or am I? What if robbed isn't the right expression? Maybe what is whisked away in the moment is not peace, but me. I fly away on the wings of entitlement. I've attempted to grasp the un-grasp-able through my unreasonable expectations. And I lose.




Peace is fragile. It is not there for the taking, a goal to achieve, but instead it is a gift that can be mine only if I lay down my expectations and selfishness. Only mine when I rest in the unknown of every moment, and the faith that God knows, even when I don't. The not-knowing becomes the expectation, the journey one of faith, and the destination a surprise. And my companion along the way ... peace.

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